#attunedpracticetuesdays: where we share the rituals and routines that are aligned with our sense of peace and wellbeing During The Dark Years (circa 2004-2019), I recall joining someone in wondering why "those people" feel the need to make queerness "like, their whole personality" (probably over some hapless barista with a small rainbow flag pin on their apron). I was a practiced asshole, a closeted queer person trying to survive in a context that condemned my very existence. (As a side note, I think I have apologized to everyone I need to from that time period, but if I overlooked you, please know the omission was not intentional). At the time of that conversation, I wouldn't have considered it odd for someone to have verses of Christian scripture wrenched from their context and plastered on every conceivable household item and accessory. It wasn't the identifying that was the problem, it was the specific identity . But as someone who is now never out of

For most of my life, I tried to be who other people told me I should be. They arrived with pretty boxes that had labels like woman, daughter, wife, mother, or Christian,  and said that the only way to be good/happy/accepted was to get into the box. So I did. After all, I wanted to be accepted and happy, and seen as good (I was also a child). But while there are probably people out there who are the same shape as those boxes, I am not one of them. The only way I fit into a box of any kind is in pieces, and even then a lot has to be left out. It's very difficult to function, much less be happy, when you're like my four year old's Mr Potato Head toy, which is missing the match to every pair and (most critically) the potato body that they go into. But I'm not a Mr Potato Head, and I finally gathered my component parts back together and put the boxes into the recycle bin so they can have a new life as something else, hopefully something less oppressive. And I've found th

July felt very long, and very slow. Not necessarily in a bad way, just like time didn't really matter or exist. We stayed home and inside a lot, ate a lot of ice pops, and splashed in a kiddie pool on the back porch as much as reasonably possible (when the humidity wasn't pushing the heat index well into the triple digits). A lot of days I looked back at the end and wondered what I had even done that day, especially to justify feeling as drained as I did. But I kept everyone fed and in clean clothes. We listened to several audio books (the kids went through the entire Bunnicula series for the first time). There were crafts and knitting and reading and journaling. We all worked on our emotional development - Middle knocked a sibling over by accident and voluntarily went back to check on them, and the little one threw his stuffed animals out of his crib at being told it was time to lay down, but when I came back from tucking in another sibling said he was feeling kinder and asked

First off the needles this past month was a shop sample Myrtlar tee, knit with Noro Uchiwa. I hadn't worked with Noro yarn for years, and it was a pleasant experience, watching the stripes form. It felt like it took forever, but I realized near the end that because the panels (it was knit in two pieces, front and back) were so wide, my concept of how long they were was skewed. I finally finished it though and I think it came out nicely. Someone contacted me about making an eyelash yarn square for them to sew on their kid's lovie to stop them pulling their own hair as they fall asleep at night, and after blithely agreeing I visited three different craft stores and discovered that eyelash yarn fell out of fashion and only found this ball in a clearance bin after I was beginning to despair. It was an afternoon's effort, and I hope it helps the little one (and eases their mama's mind, as well). Not knitting but fiber, I wove a rock. Not that I necessarily know how to weave,

#attunedpracticetuesdays: where we share the rituals and routines that are aligned with our sense of peace and wellbeing  It's been almost a year since I wrote about astrology , although I've posted on Instagram fairly often. It's not something I plan around, necessarily, but it is still an extremely helpful tool. At the moment, my favorite thing about it is the invitation to rhythm. Tonight I have a full moon circle . The moon will be in Capricorn, so we'll examine the intentions we set six months ago when the moon was new in the same sign, and make any necessary adjustments. We'll pull cards, because journaling is a wonderful tool for introspection but tarot is often direct in the areas I might soften or sidestep altogether. We'll probably also burn stuff - things we're ready to let go of, written on slips of paper and committed to flame. And then in another six months, when the moon is once again new in Capricorn, we'll embrace the culmination of thos

Attuned [adjective] sensitive to one's needs, desires, values, etc Practice [verb] to follow or observe habitually Attuned Practice: rituals and routines that are aligned with one's sense of peace and wellbeing Welcome to #attunedpracticetuesdays, where I share (either here or on Instagram if I have less to say about it) rituals and routines that are aligned with my sense of peace and wellbeing (I spent a two mile walk trying to think of a non-capitalistic way to express the concept of "what works for me" and this is where I landed). The photo at the top of this post is a good example - that's a little altar I set up for a monthly moon circle, themed around the season of Cancer the crab. Attending that moon circle on Zoom , and doing a little prep beforehand, is one of my attuned practices. But more than just sharing my practices, I also wanted to start a conversation about your practices, as well. I love hearing what other people are doing that's different f

Heat waves are rolling across the US South and rippling up off the pavement and high humidity means that walking outside results in the dampening of a downpour without the accompanying refreshment. After a too-brief spring, I'm closing not only the windows but the curtains as well and staying inside as much as possible. In lieu of a beach vacation, we're filling up a kiddie pool on the back deck on the tolerable mornings, and getting our dose of fantasy at the library. Personally, I'm doing a lot of reading, napping, and rethinking impulse desires that would require leaving the house. This is the season when I usually revisit my spiritual practices, examining what's working and what isn't, and what's changed over the past year (in terms of my practice, and my needs). A tune-up to make sure that everything is in alignment and running smoothly. I'll be sharing more than usual about my practices on Instagram , although I plan to write about it here, as well. I&