I went to a yoga class at our church on Tuesday evening. I left Brooklyn and Tobin at home with Adam, turned off my phone, and unrolled the mat that I bought years ago but haven't ever used (I actually spent about 20 minutes frantically rummaging through a closet looking for it). And for the next hour, I followed the gentle voice of our instructor as she lead us through a series of gentle movements and prayers, while the sun set and the room slowly darkened.
It was glorious.
And it was a chance to spend a little time listening to my body - and not just the parts that are loudly and actively complaining. The muscles in my back that I hadn't noticed were tense. The good ache of stretching my shoulders and neck. The tiredness in my hips (they've carried two kids, after all - they deserve to be treated gently). Everything together, as a whole.
All of that got me thinking - thinking about the ways that I sacrifice for my family while sometimes actually harming myself. I was reminded of something Leeana Tankersley said in her book Brazen:
"I believe in the value of servanthood. I believe in self-sacrificing love. I believe in putting my own needs aside to take care of those I have vowed, before God, to take care of. However, I do not like any sentiment that reinforces the idea that my needs are less important than my husband's and my children's and my home's and my pet's and my boss's. I don't think this line of thinking helps anyone."
Our family can only walk as fast as the slowest one of us - and I don't want to unintentionally slow us down, wearing myself out in an attempt to help everyone else go faster. I'd like to move forward as a whole - all together, and complete, myself.
If you'd like a chance to win a copy of Brazen, check out Tuesday's post!
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