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Those Who Wait

Uncertainty is my nemesis (I feel like I've already mentioned my relationship with uncertainty, but it bears repeating). The wondering, the lack of control, that horrible state where it's physically impossible to not do something but you're not confident about what to do - ack!

Paradoxically, I'm totally fine with waiting, once something becomes certain. For example, Christmas and my birthday fall on the same day every year, and I don't chafe against the days that lie between. But so little is actually certain...

at Marcus Tullis' Manhattan photography studio, where I was consulting on a how-to shoot for Knit Simple

That means that faith is something that I struggle with, since I see so many things as uncertain when I should just be waiting for them because God keeps His promises. The only area in which I don't have this problem is knitting - I think because that's one thing that I'm confident is something that I'm Supposed To Do. With knitting these crazy ideas drift across my mind and I accept them without question. I'd like to work for Vogue Knitting, but only temporarily, to learn more about the industry from the publisher's perspective - 4 years later, due to a combination of events that had little do with guided effort on my part and too extraordinary to be coincidental, their yarn editor went on maternity leave and I was her replacement. The only position in which I was a part of every level of the process, and the perfect learning experience (on top of which everyone there, from my coworkers to my church sisters to my roommate, was extremely kind and gave me opportunities above and beyond my job description).

That was five years ago this summer - and it still stands as the most notable example of arrogant trust upheld in my life. And while the memory (and the echoes) keep me going, I'd like to continue living that out more intentionally, not only with knitting but with the rest of my life, as well - to believe in the One who gives good things, and to embrace faithful waiting instead of uncertainty.

2548. A small Small Group, but a group nonetheless
2549. Meeting Adam for lunch so that Brooklyn and Tobin could see him, since he worked late
2550. Tobin stacking four blocks
2551. Errands before the rain, and sale raspberries and bouquets
2552. Brooklyn choosing a banana from the Whole Kids basket and eating the entire thing in the car
2553. Catching up with a long-distance friend on Voxer


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31 Days of Unraveling Designs

It's that time of year again... the 31 Days writing challenge starts today! Bloggers from all over will be writing every day of the month of October on the topic of their choosing. This will be my fourth year participating - the first year I did 7 for 31, and spent a month going through Jen Hatmaker's book 7. The second year I did 31 Days of Sustainable Dwelling, and wrote about local and fair trade living. Last year I was busy but still wanted to participate, so I went the easy route with 31 Days of Everyday Beautiful.

This year I'm diving into my greatest passion: knitting! I'll spend this month looking at past designs and talking about the inspiration behind them, so there will be plenty of regular life mixed in with the stitching - and there may be discount codes for the patterns that I write about. You'll just have to read and see!

Pattern index:

Pageturner Mitts
Hogwarts House Tie
Urban Artemis
Graffiti for Humanity
Love Out Loud
Strange Jacket


In order to change your knitting, you must first change yourself. I've lost track of how many times I've said that, or how many people I've said it to. Frustrated new knitters wondering why their work is loose or tight or uneven or really anything less than perfect. But something I love about knitting is that it's a record of your inner dialogue. That swatch knit at the yarn store table with a cozy cup of coffee and a helpful (and more experienced) knitter nearby is going to be a lot more relaxed than the sweater begun a week later while sitting next to a hospital bed - just like the knitter.

Unfortunately, this also applies to my own knitting. For years, I was apparently unaffected by the shifts and turmoils in my own life, so I assumed that I was exempt from the rule - when the reality was, in fact, that I wasn't really experiencing any of those on anything deeper than a surface level because everything was deadened by depression. When I finally started to really…


A few years ago, I was introduced to the concept of replacing the traditional list of resolutions with a single word. It appealed to me - I am not a big list person, but I love language and words and meanings and etymology and metaphor and... ahem. Ennyhoo. I liked the idea.
I've never chosen the word. It's always presented itself to me - and last year was no different. Pacific was very insistent, even though I tried to argue with it. Pacific? What does that even mean? What am I supposed to do with that?
But I accepted it, and I'm glad I did. I learned about depth and calm, about storm and nurture, about faith and adventure - and about the unstoppable ocean of God's grace, that overwhelms to fill and cleanse and bring blessings unasked.
So I'm bidding pacific a very fond farewell, and welcoming spark and whatever lessons it would like to bring. I invited it in with a copper wire punctuated with tiny lights and wrapped around my mood board, and I've got an empt…