Friday, October 16, 2015

Green...

This is day 16 in my 31 Days series on sustainable dwelling. For an introduction and more posts, head here!



Green. My favorite color. Also a color synonymous with sustainability. {Thank you, Kate!} As such, you'd think that would be easy for me to write about... but right now, it's not. Because the sort of green I've been lately is grass. The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence green.

I only figured it out yesterday evening - that the slowly building unsettled feeling, the gradual mental paralysis, was from over stimulation. As an introvert, I need regular time to be still and be alone. To lie down in green pastures, beside still waters - to restore my soul.

My soul is hangry right now - in need of something necessary that it hasn't been getting, which is making it all out of sorts for no readily explainable reason. I try to find reasons for it, though - the grocery store stopping carrying a specific spice blend that I needed, going to bed late, Brooklyn's sniffles (I suspect an allergy to whatever vibrant yellow weed is proliferating the empty lot behind our building), accidentally setting the toaster oven on fire (we're fine, btw)... But really, those things don't explain it. Plenty of good things have happened, too - more good than bad. It's just that the bad is casting shadows that keep me from seeing the shine.

Yesterday I talked about a different angle on sustainable - today, I realize that I haven't been dwelling very well, either. In the generally known sense, I've just kind of been here, not fully immersed, kept afloat by a head full of things that I haven't had time to process. Did you know that another definition of "dwell" is "a period in a cycle in the operation of a machine or engine during which a given part remains motionless"? My gears are starting to grind, and things are smoking and squeaking in an unhealthy way.

I'd like to be the kind of green that grows - that recognizes cycles of dormancy and growth, like the turning trees outside; maybe even completing that cycle on a daily basis. Looking around for knowledge rather than envy - understanding that what feeds some people doesn't necessarily feed me - and following the gentle voice of my Shepherd, as He leads me to a garden green.


It's Five Minute Friday! Each week a flashmob of bloggers internet-wide gather to write for five minutes (no stopping, no editing!) on a prompt provided by sweet Kate, then link up and share a little comment love. For more info, more posts, and/or to join in, head here!

2 comments:

Andrew said...

Y'all did a great - and transparent - job with this 'un.

#3 at FMF this week.

http://blessed-are-the-pure-of-heart.blogspot.com/2015/10/your-dying-spouse-70-green-with-envy-fmf.html

Carol Bovee said...

I sure hear ya on having those grinding parts ready to blow! :) here's to us getting some time to dwell, and focus on God's peace!
Your neighbor on FMF