Friday, June 26, 2015

Dream...

This week's gifts...
1700. A day of leave for Adam
1701. Free smoothies for wearing flip flops to Tropical Smoothie Cafe
1702. Knitting/reading/drinking tea on the balcony
1703. An overcast but not rainy day for a birthday cookout
1704. Adam not having to work, like we thought he would
1705. Time to emotionally/spiritually prepare for my day before it really got started
1706. Going to church all-four-together
1707. Adam thoughtfully putting some leftovers in the crockpot so lunch would be ready as soon as we got home
1708. An awesome new sermon series {ordinary people, extraordinary God}
1709. A Sabbath day
1710. Psalm 19:2 - this week's She Reads Truth memory verse was perfectly timed
1711. Sitting on the porch and Voxer bookclubbing 
1712. An on-sale bouquet and a free drink from Starbucks
1713. A knitting friend and her husband being in town, and coming to lunch
1714. Extra long afternoon naps, since everyone got up early
1715. Being stocked up on groceries, so it wasn't a problem that Adam needed to take my car to work while his truck was being repaired
1716. Tobin going to bed before 9, after staying up late several nights in a row
1717. Knitting and listening to this month's Hope*ologie podcast
1718. Running a solitary errand
1719. Giving Tobin a little direct interaction while Brooklyn napped
1720. Remembering the partial bag of roasted garlic Kettle chips in the cabinet, in time to have some with dinner
1721. Getting a hoped-for book in the mail
1722. Cookies from Dempsey
1723. A beautiful, cooling, awe-inspiring storm


I had a dream. It was a really big dream, one that I thought was going to take years of hard work to accomplish, if it even could be accomplished. I imagined its fruition would be the peak of my existence, and also a jumping-off point from which to move on to other great things (what, I didn't know, because I was still working on the initial goal).

And then, because God is bigger than my biggest idea, it happened (and I must confess that, while I applied myself with great dedication, it came about in such a way that only God can be credited for it). It was glorious and wonderful - but afterwards, I felt lost. I'd spent so much effort and time and energy focusing on a single point on the horizon, that I forgot the way the world curves and each horizon gives way to a new one.

I am such a Planner. A Writer of Lists and Checker of Boxes. An analyst who examines every possible probable outcome and accounts for every variable - and that is so much more satisfying when the dream is a big one. But it's also so much more disappointing when it falls through.

I was reminded today of the value of little dreams - of moving moment by moment, breath by breath, propelled forward by love and gratitude so that the dreams I have are not even mine, but my Father's. Visions of Kingdom Coming in my own little corner of the here-and-now, dreams renewed and reimagined and reinfused with a a sense of wonder and glory.

Blending One Thousand Gifts with Five Minute Friday - a weekly flashmob of bloggers who gather, internet-wide, to write for five minutes (no stopping, no editing) on a prompt provided by sweet Kate, then link up and share a little comment love. For more info, more posts, and/or to join in, head here!
I usually try not to read others' posts before I write mine, but I'm glad that I read Karrilee's today - it provided so much inspiration!

2 comments:

Mom to 3 said...

I love your gift list, and your thoughts about dreams. "Little" dreams are so important, and I know I sometimes forget and think that every dream I have needs to grandiose. I think that is the beauty of counting gifts is the celebrating the "little" moments that make up the tapestry of life. I hope you have a lovely weekend.

Karrilee Aggett said...

Aw - I love this! I'm so glad we get to count and dream together, my friend!