Monday, September 29, 2014


I am not much of a baby person. By "baby" I mean the sleepy inert beginning months that so many girls adore, envisioning snuggling a tiny animate doll and cooing over their cuteness while they sleep, and dressing them in itty-bitty outfits.

Except that the reality of spit-up, diaper malfunctions, and a child who is frustrated because the mind is willing but the motor control just isn't there (which was the case with Brooklyn) made that my least favorite point on the circle we're all a part of.

But as she begins to learn to walk and talk and practice social interaction, I applaud. She's becoming a Tiny Person - which is what I've been patiently waiting for. Each day she becomes more aware, more interactive, and more able to do.

Introverted by nature, I'm most comfortable and most familiar with first-person interaction - if I'm going to be drained by the presence of another human being, please let it be because we're actually doing something together. Sharing an experience or a place also, in way, validates it for me. Not that I need someone else to say, "Oh, this really is the best coffee I've ever had/a beautiful walking trail/a wonderful shop!" in order to make it so, but because when I do something or go somewhere I usually think of someone else who would also enjoy it, and who I'd like to share it with.

I can (and often do) enjoy a solitary cup of tea with a book on the balcony in the evening, but sometimes I'd like someone to sit across from, so we can talk and sip tea together. Time doing thing together was a gift that my parents, and especially my Mum (not because Dad didn't want to, but because he had to work), gave me as a child, and it's one that I seek to pass on.

Sadly, it's not one that a lot of people value. I'm starting now with Brooklyn (and soon Sprout) so hopefully they'll learn an early appreciation, but it's a bit alien to Adam so he wonders why it is I suggest the things that I do on days off, and since we're the new ones in town there isn't really much for me to share with anyone here that they haven't already discovered for themselves (if it's something they're interested in). So she and I try to save those adventures (like going to Artists in the Park on Saturday) for Drill weekends, when Adam's working and won't be utterly confused as to why on earth I would want to go wander around someplace with no clear goal.

I think that's also part of the reason that I'm having trouble embracing Little Rock as home. I've explored and found things to love - but now I'm stuck, needing to share those things with someone else in order to cement their value (and a sense of ownership) in my mind.

Until a time (and an appreciative person) comes to share my discoveries, I content myself with writing letters and blogging about our adventures. Adam surprised me yesterday by suggesting that we go to the State Fair in a few weeks (I wasn't going to say anything, since I didn't want him to agree to something that he didn't want to do just because I wanted to do it, because he is nice like that), and Brooklyn is beginning to be more of a sputnik [that's a traveling companion, if you wondered and didn't already know] with every step taken and every string of incoherent babble slowly becoming more understandable.

Do you prefer to explore and discover alone, or do you enjoy having a friend to share the road less traveled with?

1 comment:

Kayla said...

It is fun when the kidlets begin to process our surroundings and experiences... and enjoy doing them with us. I can still mention "Brooklyn" and "Sarah Jo" and Buddy will go back in time to when we came to visit... and elaborate on the blocks or the keyboard or the baby doll bottle.

Thanks for sharing your experiences online. While I am probably more like Adam in that on a day off I prefer to mosy around the house {unless the event/exploration has been planned well in advance}, it is fun to have friends who are not exact replicas of me. And if I was in Little Rock, I would totally go for a weekly or bi-weekly adventure together. {Because, again, if it's planned in advance or becomes routine, my brain abides well with the idea.} Since I'm not, I do need the internet and snail-mail to keep walk along with you on your journeys. :) Thanks for including me.